I'll Be Here
by kaaysive
Summary: Things take a drastic fall for longtime friends Darren and Chris when one is found to be in a relationship. What would it take for one of them to realize that the truth can actually lead you into the arms of a loving man. CrissColfer!
1. Chapter 1

**What is this you see? A new and unexpected story being posted up? Well my lovelies it is true this is another story and my attempt at making a oneshot but completely and utterly failed since I like building the anxious, nail biting feeling up :) so this one will only have two chapters. Second one will be up possibly by tomorrow.**

**Been sick early this week and was brutally kept busy with school but feeling much better now and surviving. I'm really sorry for not posting up chapter 11 for DGS I'll be sure to be done writing it by tomorrow but can't ****guarantee it. For now, I honestly hope you enjoy my first CrissColfer story! Please leave REVIEWS, I would definitely love to hear what you guys think about it! Xoxo kaaysive**

**I own nothing!**

I'll Be Here

There was something interesting about staring up at the ceiling at four in the morning. Or so, Chris assumed it was four in the morning, he couldn't tell because it was still pitch dark inside his room and he didn't really bother to look on his phone either. Not when he was possessed with insomnia and heavy thoughts about a certain someone in his mind.

Darren.

All he could think about was Darren, but why? Why couldn't he just move one from what started out as a hidden crush when he watched videos of the other man in A Very Potter Musical then not to mention when he first laid eyes on him, in person, when Darren joined Glee about two or three years ago. The man was even more gorgeous in person; it felt like an unbelievable thing to see someone as perfect looking as Darren. Chris had fallen hard and fast when their friendship became closer and stronger a few months after meeting. He loved how they were as best friends but he couldn't really prevent himself from his growing feelings towards his costar.

The problem that made everything so inevitable back then for Chris to confess his feelings to Darren was the fact that the other man was straight. It currently still was the issue because it had to make Chris move on from those feelings towards Darren. He also wouldn't want to jeopardize their close friendship; that was the last thing he ever wanted to do, even if it meant for him to move on and try to date other men. Then finding a great and sweet guy that would treat him special and was not straight.

But the conflict had been Chris' feelings getting in the way of how he felt about the man he was with. He didn't feel the same way he did around his boyfriend than he did with Darren. It was as if the other man's name was carved right on Chris' heart. He needed to just forget about it, there was no way him and Darren would ever be more than friends. It was clear that if he were to confront his costar his real true feelings about him it would only fuck up their friendship permanently. And Chris would never let that happen, no matter how willingly and deep his feelings were.

One thing was certain…it was five o'clock a.m.

Chris knew this because the loud sound filling up the still-pitch-dark room was coming his phone. It was his alarm. He had an early call for Glee this morning and had no other choice but to shove those thoughts about Darren and get out his bed for a shower.

That still didn't make matters any better because his mind still pondered on and on about Darren Criss.

L.A. weather in the morning was cold and breezy. Chris arrived at Paramount Studios in a perfect time, he will see be pulled into a hair and makeup trailer then wardrobe also. Today was undoubtedly going to be a hectic one for him.

Chris parked his car at his usually parking space in the lot. Before he could turn the engine off and grab his coffee, in which thanks to Lea Michele had gotten him addicted to, the actor so happen to coincidentally spot his dear costar parking her car next to his.

Lea, with a cup of coffee on her hand, came out of her car with so much enthusiasm and full-blown energy (by the way, Chris is definitely the opposite of the ones who carry the amount of her energy) then greeted Chris with a brief hug.

"Morning!" she greeted excitedly to him.

"Well aren't you a morning person," said Chris in a snarky tone.

Lea was, of course, use to and personally amused to her costar's witty side in the morning, only they must escalate more than any other time period throughout the day. She encircled her arm from underneath Chris' for temporary warmth from the sudden cold breeze hitting the both of them.

"So what are you're plan for the weekend?" she asked conversationally.

Oh right, today was Friday. Chris had completely forgot that _he_ was going to visit him for lunch.

"I think Michael is coming to visit me during lunch," said Chris as they both walked towards where the trailers were.

A wide grin spread on Lea's smile as they walked towards Chris' trailer.

"We're finally getting to meet this mystery boyfriend of yours, can't wait," said Lea cheerfully.

Chris rolled his eyes as he went up the steps of his trailer. "You know, for such a tiny thing you sure have a lot of energy inside."

Lea giggled at Chris' usual pretend irritation moods with her. She knew he was always a little more witty and sarcastic early in the mornings.

"Remember to eat breakfast and have a smile on that gorgeous face of yours!" teased Lea before leaving off to her hair and makeup routine.

With another eye rolling, Chris shut his trailer door and drank a sip out of his coffee before running through his lines again for the fifth or sixth time.

Darren never really thought he would carry such growing feelings for someone, especially one who he worked with everyday. It seemed impeccable because that someone was a guy. He's always fallen for girls in the past, but there was nothing with liking another guy it was just his feelings never really went beyond than friendship with them. But he's always believed that you don't fall in love with gender, you fell in love with the person.

That was when he met Chris of course. Everything changed from there, like gravity wasn't in existences anymore and the only thing floating had definitely been his heart. They clicked instantly, like two opposite batteries. Something drew Darren with more and more interest to get to know Chris, and everyday since the first day he's been pulled by a rope closer to the other man.

Once he finally realized why his heart was always picking up rapid speed when Chris entered the room, or when his breathing would vanish leaving him speechless when the other man smiled or laughed, or when he would long to see a pair of ocean blue eyes when Chris was needed on set for a scene. Darren knew this wasn't a friendship type of feeling anymore. He denied it at first, even blamed that it must have been character bleed given that he played Kurt's boyfriend onscreen. But no, off screen those feelings were completely differently than his character's because _he _was really having these feelings for another guy. His costar. His best friend.

There was no denying it anymore for the actor because he was falling, falling fast and hard for Chris.

But every chance he had to confess to Chris about how he felt seemed unmanageable since they were both always so busy. Darren had concerts, photo shoots, and, not to mention, glee where he needed to either be on set or in the recording studio.

When there were free times for the two friends, they usually spent them with each other. Darren loved hanging out with Chris whether he wasn't busy. They would go to for dinner at some inexpensive restaurant, or hang around at either one's trailer during their lunch break, and every Friday they would try to maintain a movie marathon held at Chris' house (since Darren's roommate Joey doesn't go a second without bugging them once he entered the living room finding the two men cuddle up on the couch).

A fear also gave Darren cold feet. The fear of Chris not returning his feelings made him try to move on once he came across that reason. What if Chris didn't like him back? What if confessing his feelings to Chris would ruin their entire friendship?

Darren wouldn't dream of ever risking that. He loved Chris, but he also didn't want his feelings to get in the way of what they had already. Cuddling, holding hands, and secret smiles was enough for right now. But it wouldn't be enough forever.

Darren was walking over to Chris' trailer, like he usually does, holding his script in his hand and a cup of coffee on the other.

He was always so happy to see Chris; his smile was all it took for his heart to melt.

Darren knocked on the door swiftly. Once the door swung open revealing a tall white skinned man with blue eyes, the air inside Darren's lungs had completely vanished.

Chris was breathtaking.

"Darren," greeted Chris with a warm smile.

"Hey, Chris," he managed to say after a moment.

Chris gestured for the shorter man to come inside. Why was Darren feeling so…nervous? He's never usually felt this way around Chris.

"Hair and makeup in three minutes," informed Darren once he set those thoughts aside.

Chris went over to the near by coffee table to pick up his own script. "We better go then, wouldn't want Melissa yelling at us for not being on time again."

The taller man returned over by the door, but before opening it again he extended his hand tentatively towards Blaine's. Fingers intertwined with each other instantly almost like two puzzle pieces being put together. Darren looked at their laced hands then back at Chris with an earnest smile on his face. The smile made Chris' stomach be filled with billions of butterflies inside. This is what they were comfortable with; it made everything seem right for the two of them.

If only it had been enough for either one.

"I thought about the next movie we could see tonight. Wait for it, ready? Mulan!"

Chris rolled his eyes at how Darren was so enthusiastic about their movie marathons on Fridays. He couldn't deny how heart skipping it was to see the shorter man's wide, happy grin on his face.

"When did you get the first pick? I perfectly remembered that I had gotten this week's movie claim last time," said Chris.

"Don't get me wrong, your movie choices are great and all, but that's face it we need a damn princess who can sing and runs away from everything once in a way," winked Darren teasingly.

"Mulan is a warrior."

"Still a princess."

"She carries a sword and pretends to be a guy the entire movie," countered Chris.

"She sings and falls in love with someone," said Darren.

Finally the both of them busted out in laughter.

"I can't believe we're having this discussion," said Chris between laughs.

Darren couldn't suppress the way he felt when he heard Chris laughter; it was like music to his ears.

"Places everyone!" called one of the crewmen.

Both actors had to get into their character mode, which wasn't so difficult since they were already so comfortable and at ease on acting like a couple.

After shooting Darren had to immediately go into the recording studio, while Chris had to stay on set with Lea for another hour or so.

Singing brought the best out of Darren, he felt like all of his emotions were sane and well-balanced as he sang. Some times he just wanted to pour his heart and everything that was left out, especially when he thought about Chris.

He should tell Chris how he felt.

But he would ruin their friendship if Chris didn't reciprocate his feeling back. Or maybe he won't and turns out his costar might actually like him back.

In the booth after recording a song for Glee, Darren thought real hard about whether he should or not tell Chris.

_Can't keep on '_what if'ing _anymore. I have to tell him how I feel._

His subconscious had given him the extra convincing to do what Darren needed to do. Nothing could stop him anymore. No more excuses, it can either end well, or end horribly but it matter to me because at least he would let Chris know how he's been feeling for past two years.

Recording ended a little early than Darren expected but he wasted no time, his heart was racing with him once he was looking for the taller man.

"Darren!" greeted Cory while walking with Mark.

"Hey man," said Mark with a head nod.

"Hey, have any of you seen Chris?" asked Darren.

Cory made a face like if he was trying to remember real hard about seeing Chris around today.

"Can't say that I have. But I think he had a scene with Lea," answered Cory.

"Thanks," said Darren before walking away towards Building B.

He abruptly heard Mark yell something to me in the background.

It had sounded a lot like "Follow your heart!"

Maybe a few of the cast members might of figured it out about Darren's crush (well to them it was a harmless crush) and most times they would tease him about it, even when Chris was in the same room as them! But it didn't bother him much since he always did spend a lot of time with Chris. They were inseparable. Except currently right now, as Darren tries to find the taller man, they were separable.

His subconscious was already giving him the punch about second-guessing his decision.

_Telling him would be too risky. You don't even know if he'll like you back. There's a chance he won't._

Darren shook his head in disbelief on that last part. He couldn't let himself think that way. Chris would never hurt him, and Darren would never hurt him.

Although there was a first for everything, and the shorter man was willing to still take the risk.

The sight of Lea had ease Darren on finally ending his search party. But the big question hit him instantly. Where was Chris?

"Hey, Darren!" greeted Lea happily.

"Hi, Lea. Were you with Chris by any chance?"

"Yes we just finished our scene together, but he had to leave, said something about getting someone by the front gate," informed Lea.

"What? Who?" asked Darren with full perplexity in his voice.

Lea didn't catch the worry behind Darren's tone and just giggled before speaking again. "I think he went to go get his-"

"Darren!" called a familiar voice.

There, straight ahead came Chris walking up to the two of them with his arm wrapped on someone else's intimately.

What the fuck?

Lea twirled around with a wide beaming smile and the usual bubbling excitement that's embodied inside her small quantum size body. Chris' fingers clenched onto the fabric of his boyfriend's jacket and both of them slowly came to Lea and Darren.

Compared to Lea's obvious jubilant thrill on her face and to Darren sudden change in mood made Chris slightly confused.

He thought his best friend would be happy to see him with a guy, given of all the times Chris has told him in confident about being alone forever. Darren would comfort him through those times telling him how amazing and talent he was and they would end up cuddling all night then falling asleep in each other's arms.

Chris pushed those thoughts away, fully aware that he was holding his boyfriend's arm and shouldn't be thinking another guy. Wouldn't that be kind of cheating?

"Hi I'm Lea, Lea Michele," said Lea as she extended her hand in front of Chris' boyfriend. "Chris has told me a lot about you, so much that it's usually a daily thing with him, believe me there's a lot-"

"Okay! Thank you, Lea," interrupted Chris.

"Nice to finally get to meet you. I'm Michael," chuckled Michael amusedly as he shook Lea's hand.

Darren stood frozen, almost too petrified to even tell if his heart had fallen all the way down to his stomach or if it had just shattered into trillions of pieces, or maybe both. He couldn't distinguish that because quite frankly he couldn't think clearly once his eyes felt a sting of upcoming tears.

_Boyfriend._

Chris had a boyfriend. What he heard from Lea was absolutely true since the tall, green eyed, brunette casted a glance to Chris with a soft smile and hand patting his.

Darren felt another pang wrench his heart out so brutally after seeing that view.

It wasn't the fact that Chris looked happy and smiled back to the guy…Michael was it? But it was seeing the man he loved in someone's arms.

Chris' eyes suddenly landed over to his. They were as blue as a clear blue ocean and that made Darren feel like he was stranded at sea, or worst drifting far away until he disappeared.

"Michael," said Chris. "I like you to meet Darren Criss, my costar and best friend."

_Best friend. That's all you'll ever be to him, nothing more._

Michael stretched his hand out in front of Darren with a greeting smile plastered on his face.

He even had white perfect teeth when he smiled.

Darren didn't like this guy, he couldn't he hold out or get pass by the fact that his heart was aching in severe pain. He was so close to falling apart that it was time for him run away as far as possible from here and not shake this guy's hand. And so that's what he did.

"I have to…I need to go. Don't feel well," muttered Darren before running off from the three of them.

The all watched with complete mystified looks Darren leaving off somewhere that didn't have a name. Chris probably might only have known the only two places Darren disappears to when he didn't have a good day. Today was maybe one of them.

With full concern leaping inside of him, Chris let go of holding Michael's arm and was ready to walk after the other man. But a hand delicately stopped him by the shoulder.

"I'll go check up on him. You go and enjoy lunch with Michael," said Lea with a small smile.

Chris was unsure whether Lea should go; she wasn't the one who knew him the best.

But ironically, Chris didn't even know well enough to figure Darren's appeal towards him in the last two years meant that he had feelings for him.

A knock brusquely echoed inside the trailer.

Wiping his face harshly, Darren could still feel tears dripping down his cheeks again. He knew it had been childish for him to run off like he did, but the pain was becoming too effective for him. He was hurting and completely heartbroken.

Darren's felt heartache and has been heartbroken before with past girlfriends but none other like this one. This one breached all the way through his heart deeply like an arrow shooting straight into the target.

"Darren, it's me Lea. Please open the door," said Lea behind the door.

He had no desire to walk over and open the door, but Lea didn't do anything wrong to deserve to be ignored. She wasn't the one who had hurt him.

At last, it took a lot of strength and convincing for Darren to open the door for Lea. She rushed right in with an unreadable look on her face, but it seemed to have been frustration, once the door swung wide open.

"What the hell was that, Darren? Did you not know how rude it was to leave just like…" Her voice deflated away like an air balloon with an open hole through the middle. Lea didn't even considered looking the way Darren looked when she entered. His eyes were a blood-red and sadden took upon what once use to be a happy man.

"What's the matter? Are you okay?"

Darren couldn't allow myself to let the tears fall again. He didn't want Lea to know that he was heartbroken, let alone in love with Chris.

"Nothing, I'm fine. I just don't feel well," said Darren with a hoarse voice from crying.

"You can tell me anything, Darren. And we both know that the way you're feeling right now isn't from catching a sickness."

She was right. But it still wasn't the right time to talk about Chris. He couldn't even gather to strength to think about him anymore.

"Well that's all there is, I don't feel good," said Darren inertly.

Lea wasn't close to being convinced by Darren's words. Something was bother him and he wouldn't confront her about it. But she couldn't force him to either.

"Lea, I'm…I'll be fine. Promise," said Darren gentling this time.

He saw her nod silently in response and then slowly walked over to the door before stopping again by the exit.

"I hope you'll get well then," said Lea benevolently then walking out of the trailer.

Darren's side was leaning against the edge of the opened door as he saw Lea stepping out. He felt completely awful for not telling the truth, but right now that's all that was hurting him. The truth.

Litter did he know or hear, were the quiet and hesitant footsteps approaching the steps of Darren's trailer.

Unaware of the new presences, Darren only buried his face into his hands and let the tears return. A hand softly touched the top of his gelled head. Darren looked up with teary eyes and saw who was standing in front of him.

Chris.

Chris felt his very own heart crumble like burning paper once he saw Darren with full tears on his eyes. The pain he had reflected back to him. All he wanted to do was keep his best friend in his arms forever until he became that joyful, goofy smile man that he loved. He couldn't handle what he saw in Darren right now, it caused his chest to hurt.

So he decided to shift Darren off of the edge of the door so that he was able to close it and pull the shorter man over to the couch and keep him close. They sat on the couch with arms draped around each other. Chris didn't want to say anything just yet; he couldn't when Darren continued to cry again. The taller man pulled him closer, bringing Darren up to his chest feeling the tears soaking his shirt but could less about it. His best friend was breaking right in his arms and all he wanted to do was piece him together again.

After what seemed like forever but in reality was only close to an hour, Chris heard Darren's crying die down into sniffles. He still kept the shorter man wrapped securely and tight against him before asking him.

"Sorry I got your shirt wet," said Darren first in a soft tone then pulling away from Chris. Being close to him wasn't going to make things any easier.

But Chris shifted back towards him closely with a perplexed look by the sudden distance Darren was putting between them.

"What's really bothering you, Darren," asked Chris reaching for the other man's hand. "Because I know it isn't cause you're getting sick."

It was now or never. Maybe never came too soon for Darren though.

He would tell Chris whether he be his or not. But maybe now wasn't the right moment to do that. Although it would be better to let him know how he truly felt, it would make everything that seemed to have fallen apart start to build again slowly if he told him. He would move on somehow, maybe in time Darren will learn to get over his feelings for Chris.

"Darren…you can tell me anything, you know that. I'm your friend, I'll always be here for you," said Chris comfortingly.

Darren's breath hitched, his breathing felt painful by the word 'friend'. It was something he didn't want to hear. Thoughts roamed back to seeing Chris with that guy earlier. Darren felt his fist clench. This was anger and jealousy taking over him now.

His sudden anger had entirely vanish away as soon as he felt a soft and gentle hand caress his cheek, pulling him to look directly to the man sitting next to him.

Blue eyes met hazel ones, their hearts stopped for a brief second.

Darren closed his eyes shut, leaning into the comfortable and familiar touch. He felt his heart starting to repair itself just by Chris comforting him…as a friend only. It was still something.

Chris' thumb was delicately circling his thumb a spot of skin under Darren's right eyes, admiring at how beautiful this man looked while he knew that something was deeply bothering him.

This is where he couldn't stop himself or control his emotion on how he felt about Darren. There were boundaries he would set for himself and draw the line when things became too close for comfort. Right now had been one of them.

They were both close to each other, faces a few inches apart, arms wrapped around one other, and eyes planted into the both of them.

"Tell me," whispered Chris.

"It's too late," whispered Darren back.

Chris felt his heart speeding up inside his chest. Darren was so close to him that their lips could just cover the small gap up instantly.

"Please," pleaded Chris gently as he rested their foreheads together.

Darren was so close to just kissing Chris at that moment. He was so close to telling him his feelings.

His heart was beating fast that he was sure Chris would hear it. Soon the words would leave his mouth before he could stop them.

"I…I'm in love with you," said Darren then pulling away from Chris. He would never be able to take the chance to ever look at him if the truth was out now. But he wouldn't wait another second without kissing him for the first and last time.

Darren turned back to Chris and closed the gap between them, his lips catching the other man's in a split second. His hand resting on one of Chris' cheek, and the other one bringing his slim body closer to him by the waist.

Chris felt his heart stop, his breathing disappearing, and his mind catching up with what was happening. He finally comprehended everything and became aware that Darren was kissing _him._ That's when the limits didn't exist anymore, the boundaries break, and the drawn line disappearing into thin air. His conscious was finally catching up to the way Darren kissed him, Chris responded and kissed him back.

Sure the two actors have kissed each other before but only on set for a scene as Kurt and Blaine. It was nothing compared to this between Chris and Darren. What they were feeling was the same for one another.

It seemed like it continued on forever, but it had only been a few minutes of them kissing. They were losing air inside so Darren found the will to pull away but resting their foreheads together again.

Chris felt like he was floating on a cloud when kissing Darren, it's all he's ever wanted to do.

Except something pushed him back into reality.

Michael.

Michael his boyfriend suddenly came into thought. He had cheated on him.

The taller man shook his head in a disbelieving way and pulled away from Darren, standing up and pacing back and forth as guilt crept onto his skin. He's never cheated on someone before.

"Chris?" said Darren slowly standing up from the couch.

But the other man only kept on pacing. "I can't…I can't believe I just did that."

Now the arrow was aiming right for Darren's heart again.

Chris stopped pacing and looked directly to him with tears of his own filling up in his blue eyes. "I can't…I'm already with Michael."

The arrow shot onto his repairing heart, causing the pang to hit him twice as hard as before.

"But, Chris, I love-"

"Stop, please don't say it," interrupted Chris.

Darren tentatively took a step forward. "It's the truth. I do."

"No, no it isn't," said Chris disbelievingly. "You think it's some sick joke for you to suddenly say you're in love with me? Just because I'm the only gay kid here doesn't make it right for you to do this to me. You don't love me. You're straight, Darren."

Darren could surely feel his heart being cut open now inside from the arrow.

He couldn't believe what he was hearing it was all a misunderstanding. Before he could grasp on every word Chris had said, he saw the other man walking to the door.

"No, Chris wait," he said following after him. "You're wrong, please just listen to what I have to say."

But it was too late already. Chris had walked out that door before he could say anything more.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello everyone! Indeed I've come back from the dead lolol sorry about the long period of delay for this story it's been pretty insane with school right now. I hope you're all doing well though especially now since the second chapter for this story is finally up :D AND I will be posting my new Klaine story tomorrow woo! Hope you all like this one... PLEASE leave reviews, I'd like to know what you think about it :) Enjoy! Xoxo kaaysive**

**Again, I own absolutely nothing from Glee or the actors!**

I'll Be Here

Chris couldn't believe what had just happened in Darren's trailer. As the actor felt the harsh wind hit his face, tears suddenly rolled down on his cheek. Darren's words kept replaying inside his head like a broken record. He felt his heart thump wildly when he remembered the words leave Darren's lips.

_He_ was in love with him. Something that Chris never expected, or prepared himself, to ever hear those words coming out of Darren's mouth.

But why did he deject the other man's words?

All Chris really wanted to immediately do was take Darren into his arms and kiss him again and just love him back. But that didn't seem to be as easy as he thought.

Thoughts were rapidly going through his head like wheel spinning continuously. He had doubts piling up in a stack and he couldn't push them away when another one came to mind.

Had could Darren be _in_ love with him if he was straight? There was no way Chris could believe in that so simply. He wants more than a friendship with Darren but he also didn't want a man who was confused about his own sexuality. Besides, how would they take media's destruction? Darren would come out as a gay man because he abruptly felt more feelings towards his costar. His career would completely fall into pieces and that was another thing Chris didn't want for him.

And then there was Michael, his boyfriend.

Chris can't just end things with him, can he? The reason why the actor wanted to start dating again was because the man he ended up falling for, who he _thought_ would never like him in that way, was straight. He needed to move on from those feelings but how could he when Darren was always there with him, always there _for _him. The other man was his best friend; they would do and say things they would never do with their other friends. Chris loved the moments when Darren and him would watch movies all night on the couch cuddling and then lying close to each other until they both fell in a peaceful sleep in one another's arms. He knew that being with his best friend was too much for him to handle since moving on was what he was trying to do in the first place. But he couldn't repress the bubbly feeling that stirred up inside his stomach almost like there were butterflies when he saw Darren. When the shorter man would smile it took Chris' breath away. Then when he sang to him, Chris always had the urge to wrap his arm around Darren's neck and capture his lips with his.

Moving on never really helped the actor, no matter how much he tried. That's why there was Michael. Each day Chris felt like his fantasy world where Darren and he could finally get to be together was only a just a fantasy. Waiting would seem forever for the brunette, so he needed to try to push those feelings away deep inside a far away corner and see where things will end up with dating Michael.

This all changed until a few minutes ago when Darren had just confessed to Chris that he liked, no _loved_ him.

Chris groaned in almost frustration and buried his face in his hands. There was a problematic in this situation that thinking was getting him nowhere. Chris' back leaned against on one of the trailers, definitely far away from Darren's, and whipped the new upcoming tears stubbornly before they could even fall.

Everything was fucked up. Chris didn't want to choose, but that's what he did. He already knew whom he would pick, but there was a whole other part, which he just went through right now, that would branch out if he chose him. Also losing the other would make him feel any less better since he technically cheated on his boyfriend.

This inner turmoil Chris had conflicting inside of him wasn't exactly helping anymore, the taller man whipped any wet tears on his face and started to walk to set. He would be called in soon and whether he felt like shit or not, he had to mask his distress and continue on.

* * *

Inside the set were busy crewmen rushing from place to place everywhere that Chris needed to stop a few times to let them all walk pass him. He had another scene to do with Lea today for another hour then one with Darren after. Things were heavy right now with him and Chris would have to just set that aside when they see each other again.

Lea approached the taller man halfway with a noting look towards him. She suspecting something was bothering him too, but she couldn't ask before having Chris blurting something first.

"I need to tell you something." Lea nodded after a few seconds and was suddenly being tugged on the arm as the both of them walked off set. Chris assumed that no one would notice if they were gone for a few minutes.

Lea's understanding and sympathy was turned into confusion and anticipation now when she didn't know where Chris was taking her. Once they reached walked through a curtain doorway, Lea saw the auditorium set down below where they were standing. Chris dragged her into the far back where the seats where and looked around just in case no hears were ease dropping.

"Chris, tell me already!" Lea said impatiently now. "Why was Darren so upset? Did you get him to tell you? Is he even really sick?"

"Would you stay quiet, someone might hear you," said Chris.

"Then tell me," complaint Lea.

Chris huffed out a deep breath and then ran a hand through his hair.

"Darren isn't sick. He kissed me…" Chris whispered the last sentence so softly that Lea didn't seem to have heard him.

"Wait what I didn't hear you," said Lea taking a step closer.

"Darren kissed me, all right," said Chris aloud.

Wide eyes and jaw dropping was Lea's facial reaction before she could form words.

"Ohmygod! What? Darren kissed-"

Immediately Chris covered Lea's mouth with his hand preventing her to finish that sentence in a shocked and loud tone.

"Shhh! I told you to be quiet," whispered Chris harshly before looking around to see if there might have been anybody near them.

Muffling continued from the actress with much outraging shock conducting her. Her hands were brought on top of Chris' single one and then teeth met skin.

The sudden action stirred Chris away from the stress with a squeal. "Ouch! What the hell Lea?"

Chris whipped from his hand on the fabric of his pants. Maybe doing that to her wasn't the greatest of ideas. Now he knows not to do that again.

The shocking look didn't leave on the actress's face with complete inquisitiveness seeped through her.

"You can't be serious? Darren kissed you?" asked Lea perplexed. "Wait a minute but when I went to go check up on him he looked oddly sad and upset about something. And then he goes on kissing you?"

Chris stayed silent. There was nothing much he could say until Lea's next question came up.

"Did you…kiss him back?" she asked gently this time.

There was more to that question and Chris knew what she meant by that. So he nodded admittedly answering the real question behind that one.

"Yeah, I did," he answered almost inaudibly for any soul to hear.

Lea took a step closer to him putting a hand on her costar's shoulder comfortingly. Chris looked at her and saw the sympathy in her eyes.

"But all I did was run away after he confronted me about his feelings. I was scared and obviously I couldn't believe if that was true or not. Darren is..."

"Darren is clearly in love with you, Chris. You can see it in his eyes in the way that he looks at you, but you never noticed it. My guess is that he didn't know about Michael and was surprised by the idea of seeing you with someone else."

"How could I believe that what he feels for me is as real as to what I feel for him? He's straight and…"

Lea shook her had in a disagreeing matter. "You know the kind of person Darren is and he isn't like that. Whoever he falls in love with is with the _person_, not the gender."

"What would the media think about him? Lea, they will eat him alive and his career," countered Chris.

A small smile touched the corner of Lea's face. "Since when did Darren ever care about what people think of him? I mean, sure there will be stuff said about him that could affect his career but it wouldn't make a difference on how he feels about you."

Chris wrapped his hands around himself protectively. He never thought that his doubting could mean so little now. But something was still prevailing him from finding Darren and letting him know how he felt.

"Did feel about me. I told him that I chose Michael over him," admitted Chris.

Lea rubbed his shoulder hearteningly again. "We both know that Michael isn't who you really wanna be with. It's not too late, you could tell him how you really feel."

* * *

Darren hadn't realize how cold it had gotten in the middle of the afternoon, but the sun was still visiting him with little warmth from the heavy clouds. The actor kept himself warm in his jacket as he felt the tears dry up on his skin. Except when he thought about Chris it only made him fight back from another sob to return.

How could he love a man who was already taken? How would he even move on? It seemed like an inevitable thing for him to just forget about his feelings for Chris. He's tried that once before and look where it's gotten him. He kissed Chris and then the other man just broke his heart after that.

It was a mistake to have done that.

Yet, Darren couldn't bring himself to think that was mistake because it certainly wasn't for him. With his heart aching inside from pain, Darren still loved Chris, and what's made him feel the tears drop from his eyes again.

How would he ever move on?

The wind blew pass Darren with a cold breeze, he snuggled inside his green jacket more and closed his wet eyes. No one would find him here, where he was this place was his sanctuary to think. The other reason that nobody would ever think to come look for him here was because Darren was on the rooftop of an old costume building on the other side of the entire studio.

He's been up here a couple of times just to get his mind off of things or the need of a new settlement that his trailer didn't have. Probably the worse thing right now for the actor to realize was that Chris, his best friend, knew about Darren's hide away here. But he most likely wouldn't come up here; Darren _knows_ Chris and he wouldn't leave someone (his boyfriend) behind just because Darren was heartbroken. Besides, he had already watched out of him earlier.

Maybe he should quit the show. He would get the chance to focus back on his music. His brother Chuck lived in New York maybe Darren should do the same and move there to do music.

Except deep down, Darren couldn't do something like that and leave everything here in L.A. behind. He would leave Chris for good if he did. They would be 2,789.9 miles apart. Separating himself from Chris would just make matters worse. Seeing those blue eyes, that sweet smile, his unique laugh, and the feel of their hands intertwining together are what Darren would miss each day. His heart would probably make him run through those entire miles just see Chris again.

Darren unburied himself from the warmth of his jacket and took a deep breath to release the words in a song.

His hazel eyes were looking straight towards the view of the buildings and the sky above him.

_Shadows fill an empty heart_

_As love is fading,_

_From all the things that we are_

_But are not saying._

_Can we see beyond the stars_

_And make it to the dawn?_

His hazel eyes were looking straight towards the view of the buildings and the sky above him. The tears slowly stopped rolling down Darren's face as his voice was starting to get stronger.

_Change the colors of the sky._

_And open up to_

_The ways you made me feel alive,_

_The ways I loved you._

_For all the things that never died,_

_To make it through the night,_

_Love will find you._

_What about now?_

_What about today?_

_What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?_

_What if our love never went away?_

_What if it's lost behind words we could never find?_

_Baby, before it's too late,_

_What about now?_

The pain inside his heart was drowning itself away into the lyrics of the song. Emotions escaped out of Darren's voice with a beautiful melody flowing through it. The cold breeze didn't bother him as much once he lost himself in music.

Without hearing the distant footsteps climbing up on the stairs behind, Darren closed his eyes, putting all of what he was feeling into the lyrics and expressing them out in his voice.

_The sun is breaking in your eyes_

_To start a new day._

_This broken heart can still survive_

_With a touch of your grace._

_Shadows fade into the light._

_I am by your side,_

_Where love will find you._

_What about now?_

_What about today?_

_What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?_

_What if our love, it never went away?_

_What if it's lost behind words we could never find?_

_Baby, before it's too late,_

_What about now?_

Thoughts were filled with images of Chris, he thought about the times of they spent the pass three years together with movie marathons, Harry Potter obsessing, mending their voices together in a duet, cuddling, sleeping in each other's arms, holding hands, kissing him…

This time it was distinctly heard of footsteps tentatively moving closer. Darren knew now he was not alone on this rooftop, but that didn't stop his voice from evolving to the melody of the song, or from slowly turning around to see the person standing in front of him.

_Now that we're here,_

_Now that we've come this far,_

_Just hold on._

_There is nothing to fear,_

_For I am right beside you._

_For all my life,_

_I am yours._

_What about now?_

_What about today?_

_What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?_

_What if our love never went away?_

_What if it's lost behind words we could never find?_

What he found were familiar blue eyes that usually made his heart skip a beat, but they weren't holding the same warmth or happiness inside. He would do anything to take any pain away from Chris, no matter how broken Darren's heart was.

The taller man continued stepping forward cautiously to Darren, once he was close enough, with a few inches of distance between them, Chris could see the damages inside his favorite pairs of hazel eyes. He felt like horrible for what he did to this man, the man that he did love with his whole heart.

Chris could hear the wretchedness wavering in Darren's voice as he sang. The aftermath of what happened to the both of them was left with this now. He left Darren with a shattered heart.

_What about now?_

_What about today?_

_What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?_

_What if our love never went away?_

_What if it's lost behind words we could never find?_

_Baby, before it's too late,_

_Baby, before it's too late,_

_Baby, before it's too late,_

_What about now?_

Darren's voice was unhurriedly starting to fissure once he ended the song with a beautiful note of the last words.

Silence surrounded the atmosphere, Darren's heaving breath after singing was the only sound made.

The shorter man's eyes wandered towards the floor, he couldn't dare allow his heart to fall into pieces once Chris tells him that he doesn't want anything to do with him after this. Darren wasn't ready to hear the words, but he would just about anything for Chris.

Darren wouldn't believe in moving on from his feelings towards Chris, but he did believe in the other man's happiness, even if that meant departing into 2,789.9 miles away.

"You've never missed a day of shooting before," said Chris. "I…I was afraid you maybe might have quit."

"I was thinking about it." Chris' entire face fell. Darren was thinking about leaving him for good all because of what he had done. "But I wouldn't bring myself to leave everything behind."

_Everything meaning you,_ thought Darren.

Chris' eyes looked away from the shorter man and he took a deep breath. They were so broken, Darren on the most part, but Chris had lied to him. Of course he loved Darren back, but the other man didn't know that which made the situation even worse for him. He couldn't stand looking at Darren so shattered and wrecked anymore. All Chris wanted was to see the other man friendly and jubilant again.

"He's asked me before, you know. Wondered so much why I spent more time with you than with his own boyfriend. It's crazy because I wonder about the same thing and can't seem to find the answer sometimes."

"Chris, I don't need an explanation. What's done is done," said Darren trying to block any more words from Chris that his heart probably couldn't take to endure.

Except Chris didn't stop, this explanation was more than just that for him.

"I've been in love with you since the first time I laid eyes on you." Now Darren didn't expect to hear those words come out of Chris' mouth. "You think I'd jump into your arms after finally hearing you say that to me," said Chris laughing with no real humor to it. "Except I was afraid because not only would I ever have expected to hear those words come from you, but because I never thought someone like you would have feelings for someone like me."

Darren shook his head in disbelief, he tried to shake off the outrageousness but that didn't disappear because his ears clearly heard Chris say that he loved him.

"But you said you chose Michael already," said Darren looking at Chris, searching for something in those blue eyes.

Chris felt the tears slip from his eyes absently. "I lied not only to you about that but to myself. I made up reasons why being with you wouldn't work out, and if something did happen that would lead to us breaking up if we gave it a chance then the pain of it would be unbearable for me."

Soon enough more tears rolled down from Chris' face, but Darren closed the small inches between them and cupped his face to whip them off.

"I would never hurt you, Chris. You have to believe in that, please. Nothing will stop me from feeling the way I do about you. You are amazing and perfect. I love absolutely everything about you. To me you are so much more than what you think of yourself. I fell in love with _you_, and just you makes me feel so happy to be with," said Darren with a small smile touching the corner of his mouth.

Chris rested his forehead on Darren's, letting the tears to fall from his eyes still. All that reflected from those honey colored eyes were pure raw emotions.

"Walking out on you was the biggest mistake I've ever done. I've only ever wanted to be with you. Would you forgive me and accept me back if I let you pick the movie for tonight?" said Chris with a smile of his own.

A soft chuckle escaped out of Darren. "I forgive you, and I be honored to accept you back."

Leave it to them to patch each other's wounds up, besides they were best friends and now boyfriends. Chris knew where he left his heart and who it belonged to after breaking up with Michael before coming to the rooftop. The man in front of him, the one he so desperately wanted to kiss and repair Darren's heart up completely. He wouldn't let anything stop him from loving Darren and that's something he would truly do.

Darren was close to slipping away but, he too, knew where his heart lied in the hands of and he wouldn't be leaving off to anywhere anymore. With the man he loved in front of him, Darren was sure to stay forever in his arms.

"I love you, Darren," said Chris lovingly before his lips felt the sweet soft feeling of Darren's lips kissing him.

"I love you, too," said Darren with an equal amount of lovingness with in his words.


End file.
